I've struggled writing the past couple of weeks. Mid-month I had a slew of thoughts that seemed to ooze out of my fingers effortlessly and compile themselves into paragraphs and stories. But once those thoughts had officially evacuated I was left feeling vulnerable with a BAD case of writer's block. I sat down so many times to write something only to stare blankly at a white page and a blinking courser. Repeatedly, I begged that man I love to tell me what to write about. After I continuously rejected his suggestions, guilt overwhelmed me, and I wrote about Andrea's new favorite word because it was important to him. A small part of me thought if I just wrote something inspiration would once again fill the empty chasms in my head. It did not.
So I rubbed my two brain cells together and tried to identify the problem. After a brief conversation with my little sister where she asked me what I wanted to write about, I realized that my problem wasn't having nothing to write. It was having too many personal things to write.
So here I sit, on my eighth (no joke) attempt to write beyond this point.
Friday before I saved and give up writing all together, I typed "I feel like a loser" and shut down my laptop. But after watching General Conference this weekend I can actually say I feel renewed. So many of my personal issues were addressed, and I'm left with hope.
With my renewed spirit I've begun making a dress for Andrea that will look smashing on Paul's graduation day. I've started reading a new book. That's one of my goals for the month-- to read the book club book and another book on the side. I spent some time baking at my mom's house, and once the men left for the priesthood session Saturday night, us ladies youtubed some classic 70's hits and danced till our feet hurt. Literally.
I'm so grateful for my family. I would be lonely if they weren't so close. Sometimes I just need to lighten up a little and my sisters and my mom and my goofy little brother and my dad just make me laugh until I'm sore.